And we know that God causes everything to work together[a] for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them. ~ Romans 8:28
We should have been enjoying summer in Ottawa by now but God had other plans. By other plans I mean a promotion and four other employees will go there for training with the husband soon. God is really good! I’ve been preparing for the trip for weeks now (read: shopping) but I had to endure the pain once more of a cancelled trip. My best friend Cecille promised to fly to Canada from the US. I also thought of flying to Winnipeg to meet family and friends. I already made a schedule of our day-to-day activities while there: park and play with the little tot, cook, work, walk, explore, shop, pick up the husband, cook dinner, then work again. On weekends we would hit the tourist spots. On Sundays we’d go to a nearby Assemblies of God church.
All those and more won’t be happening anytime soon. Noah and I were denied our visas. Believe it or not, I wasn’t saddened by the news. I was pissed off! Majorly pissed off because of the fact that we were from a third world country. And you know how it’s never easy to get a visa to a first world country simply because of the previous fellow countrymen who went there and never came back. My son and I weren’t able to overcome the presumption that we will be coming back to the country or so the Canada embassy says. Fine. That, despite the official invitation from my husband’s boss, their sponsorship, the funds, documents, and more.
I cried. I asked God “Why?” For a moment, I took self-pity and hated the fact that I’m just a homemaker and a freelancer. “Maybe I should get a job”, I told my husband. “I could be earning more than you do”, I boasted. But he answered, “No, you are great. We don’t need to change that. I don’t want you to work again because I want us to be together all time and I prefer that you take care of our son.”
I cried again. I’ve been taking care of my husband and my son, running a household, all the while working full-time. Yes, I still work full-time for my boss of three years but on flexi schedule now. I’d get crazy juggling all the things I need to. I sleep late, 3 AM being the earliest, to finish my job. I’m the one doing the admin tasks for my other boss (the husband). I was the one who prepared all the requirements for the embassy and dealing with the agency—only to be refused a visa! I asked God, “Why?”. And you know what He answered during my quiet time the next day? STAY PUT.
God told me to stay put. Relax. And wait.
It’s not time for us to experience those things yet. He reminded me that my reward will come someday. It’s Joshua’s time to shine. His current job, I believe, is his breakthrough. What homebased job brings an employee to the US, Canada, and other countries for more work and training? It’s a blessing. We are blessed! Who am I to complain? I have been working at home since I left the corporate world four years ago. I get my husband’s full salary and manage our finances. I’ve got a great husband who is very supportive, loving, and one who is very hands-on with our child. We’ve got a good place to stay albeit still renting. I’ve got my family and friends. I have my husband. I have my sweet baby Noah. I have my God.
So I finally accepted. God comforted me right away by giving my husband a promotion. Hallelujah! That’s enough for me now. With promotion comes great responsibility. I know he’d be busier and that it would also mean more work for me being his Executive Assistant but I’m not complaining. God is really good!
You may not understand why things are happening in your life now. You may be hurting, suffering, or maybe even too overwhelmed with the feeling of success, remember that God has a purpose even when you can’t see it. My husband and I now understand God’s humor. We’ve seen firsthand how hurtful situations can lead to something better. We’ve finally understood how and why He’d taken us out of our comfort zones to bring us to a place where we could have a better life…to a place where we can be better utilized for His glory.
Charles Spurgeon once said, “God will not use a man greatly until He has hurt him deeply.” Psalm 34:18 also says, “The Lord is near to the brokenhearted”. It is the means that He uses mightily His people. He works more deeply within our hearts when we are hurting.
What used to be broken vessels are best for His service. I’d like to think we (my husband and I) were broken vessels made whole. We are works in Progress or “WIPs.” As WIPs, we are always inclined to come to Him always. In that sense, all of us are works in progress until the day we meet our Savior. Then, we will be complete works–Masterpieces.